By Sam Schmidt
A child of the 90s expects all of her problems to be solved,
If not by Fairy Godmother,
Then in a bluish puff of Robin Williams.
Should she find herself on her hands and knees,
Scrubbing the linoleum,
She knows that somehow, her troubles will burst away
Like iridescent rainbow bubbles,
And mice will help her get ready for prom!
If she wishes for prince charming,
She expects his face to appear beside hers
In the water of the wishing well
Or, you know, basically any time after 11:11.
Naturally, she would trade anything
For the sort of legs he would admire;
Bonus points if she can pull off a seashell bra.
Then, should she fall asleep for 100 years after the party,
She knows her prince will kiss her awake.
So maybe the “whole new world” he showed her
On his magic, beer-stained carpet
Was not quite what she expected.
Hakuna matata! Leo burns brightly overhead,
And as long as there are still hills down which to tumble,
The Circle of Life moves us all.